Valentine's Day is a little more than 4 weeks away. For many divorcees looking for love, it's looming over them like opening day for a Pittsburgh Pirates fan - mostly dread but a little dash of optimism.
So it's right about now, that many adult singles turn to the promise of internet dating web sites to find that special someone…or at least someone to catch dinner and a movie with on Valentine's.
Internet dating is great. I met my wife on Yahoo Personals. One of my best friends met his wife on another site and I know many other people -- divorcees and others that have found love online. BUT internet dating sites are NOT a magical solution for lovelorn divorcees. Just like everything in life (and especially anything related to love or intimacy) there's a right way and a wrong way to do it. (Women - you're nodding your heads right now, I know).
I believe the key to internet dating is the online profile. The profile is a chance to either shine (and find that perfect someone) or screw up the whole thing (and attract all the wrong people or nobody at all). It all depends on what you say and more importantly what NOT say.
So Woman and Men – here are some tips on what NOT to do on that profile if you want to find love online.
Women
DON'T -- under any circumstances use the words "princess", "prince", "shining armor", anywhere in your online profile. You may not know this, but 99.9% of guys find this ridiculous and pathetic and a complete turn-off. The only exception to this rule is if you are in fact an actual princess by royal title and can prove it.
DON'T -- put only pictures of you in group photos. This seems obvious, but I can't tell you how many profiles I saw when I was single where I honestly couldn't tell who was the person and who was the person's friend, sister or whatever. We’re guys and we’re idiots. Don’t confuse us with the pictures, crop your friend out.
Men
DON'T -- under any circumstances use the phrase "work hard and play hard", or talk about how many times per week you work out including details of your whole "awesome" workout regime. 99.9% of women don’t care and it usually makes you sound like a jerk.
DON’T – list only physical qualities about what type of woman you’re looking for. If you’re only into skinny blondes with great smiles and huge “assets”, I suppose that’s fine, but if that’s all you say, again you look like a shallow jerk. Talk about a few other things too.
Both Sexes
DON'T -- Have a ton of misspelled words and grammatical errors in your profile. This is just inexcusable. You're accessing a web site with a computer, it has spell check. Use it! Nothing makes you look like more of a loser than a personal profile that says how much you love dinner and "desert" and enjoy spending time with "frends".
DON'T -- Put more than 6-8 pictures on your profile. More than that and it starts to look weird and you look you’re a little too into yourself.
DON’T – Put up horrible grainy photos that look like they were taken with a web cam. These days, even cell phones take decent pictures. If you’re serious about online dating, find a decent digital picture of yourself or scan in a good print. It costs like a dollar at a drugstore.
Good luck!
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