The apartment on the Upper East side was a no go. Let’s just say, it looked better on the website! I drove home and emptied my car.
Stuffed garment bags, health and beauty aids, tennis racquet, squash goggles, shoe boxes, sheets, towels, vacuum, cleaning supplies and a jewelry box flood the floor of my den awaiting their return to Manhattan.
“Why didn’t you call?” said my friends as they rallied.
“I would have contacted my sister,” said one.
“My ex-brother-in-law,” said another.
“Come to the beach! Stay as many days as you want,” they offered.
“I am working on some options,” was a caring text.
“I have a ray of hope,” said a pal with a lead on an apartment.
“You have got to call on your friends,” a buddy scolded.
Call on my friends? I wanted help from no one, I thought I had it covered.
I envisioned myself on a date by now, walking arm in arm around SoHo with one of the men anticipating—I hoped—my arrival.
One man I hoped to see in NY, I dubbed Mr. Fishnets and Closed Toed Shoes. We met at a squash tournament last winter. He works on Wall Street, is quite handsome and is at least ten years younger than I. Justifiably, I was flattered by his interest in me.
But when he sent a text, “Wear fishnets and closed toed shoes,” I found an excuse not to meet him.
Months later, on my drive to New York, I mustered up the courage to call.
“I gotta be honest with you,” I told Mr. Fishnets and Closed Toed Shoes. I just finished my divorce, I’m new to the dating scene, and I’m not coming to New York to meet someone, have sex with him, then meet someone else and have sex with him. Do you understand?”
Mr. Fishnets and Closed Toed Shoes was quiet a few seconds. Then he said rather softly, “Will you at least be open-minded?”
I’m not that open-minded. I have standards; they're low, but I have them.
Tell us some of your post-divorce surprises?
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Better Days Ahead (6 months ago) I am new to the dating scene too. Recently was in San Francisco and tried to have fun and meet people when I was out at a bar with co-workers. Unfortunately, both guys who came up to me were married, one of them being a person I know through my job. My ex was a prolific cheater, so getting hit on by married men is a sensitive subject for me. I was very discouraged to think about the prospects of meeting someone in this new stage of life.